He looked down at his hands. They were yellow, C-shaped claws. He tried to scream, but all that came out was a classic LEGO "Oof!"

Leo blinked. His room was gone. He was standing on a floor of smooth, grey studs. Above him, the sky wasn't blue—it was a flat, matte plastic ceiling. "Oh, no," he whispered. His voice sounded… clicky.

"If you die here," Obi-Wan warned, "you don't just respawn. You get tossed into the bin with the mismatched Mega Bloks."

The link shimmered on the screen, a neon siren call in a sea of shady forums:

Leo knew better. He really did. But the digital gold edition was sixty bucks, and his bank account currently held the approximate value of a plastic lightsaber hilt. He clicked.

"You downloaded the 'Free' version," Obi-Wan said, sighing. "The Empire loves a bargain-hunter. They’ve been using pirated copies as traps to recruit 'expendable' Stormtroopers. You’re currently a Minifigure-class civilian in a corrupted save file." "How do I get out?" Leo asked, his claw-hands shaking.

As if on cue, a Gonk droid flew past them at eighty miles per hour, backwards, while a nearby palm tree vibrated until it exploded into blue studs.

The download bar crawled like a slow-moving Bantha. 98%... 99%... Complete.